Time Runner

IMDb Plot Synopsis: Finding itself invaded by a superior alien force in the year 2022, humanity's last hope lies with fighter pilot Michael Raynor who is hurled through a time warp back to the year 1992. Relentlessly hounded by a ruthless agent belonging to a super-secret government organization, Raynor learns he can affect the future and, with the help of scientist Karen McDonald, attempts to alert authorities to the upcoming alien threat.

Talkingship's Viewing: The Comish decided he'd had enough of listening to Nerves and I TALK about doing a BMDD over Xbox Live but never deliver, so he set one up spur of the moment.  There were six of us in all (Nerves, Comish, Chupps, Roper, Fisherman, and myself) that teamed up to test out the system.  I'll get into more detail on how the Netflix/Live experience went in a review on the games page.  For now, let's stick with the movie.  The plot's paper thin, so be careful not to let your finger pop on through and into the stink eye. 

If you want to have an easy, fun time with BMDD, then pick a movie who's main star is a washed up, former superstar desperately trying to hang onto his/her fame.  In this instance we have Mark Hamill  Now, let not a disparaging word be said about the Hamill!  He was LUKE freaking SKYWALKER!  But, of course, having him in a bad movie allows for endless Star Wars references (which inspired the Drinky Rule of this BMDD!)  If you can't have a good time making fun of a bad sci-fi movie starring Mark Hamill, then you need to burn your BMDD license.  This shit is pure gold.

Having Mark Hamill in your BMDD is fodder for lightweights, but Time Runner stepped its game up considerably by sticking in an actress (completely UNCREDITED on the box!) that is orgasmic for any BMDD veteran.... Rae Dawn Chong!!  Good Lord, why don't I OWN this movie?!?!?  (edit - because it's shite, that's why.)

BMDD Drinky Rule: The special rule for this movie was suggested by Chups, and it was a good one.  Take a drink for every FUNNY Star Wars reference.  Any special drink rule that involves celebrating a compatriot's funny joke is a fantastic way to make the BMDD experience more fun.  Needless to say, we were drinking a lot!

Cheesability: 5 Since we had a full group, instead of giving you mine and Nerves' numbers for each of the scores, I figure I'll compile the scores (iow - I'm giving you my scores only, get over it.)  This film scores a solid 5 on the Cheesability scale.  They might never again make a movie that is this easy to make fun of.  It has Mark Hamill in it!  And he's from space!!  AND THEN THERE'S RAE DAWN CHONG IN IT TOO!!!

Drinkability: 4 There are a lot of blue lights (for those BMDD noobs out there, you are supposed to take a drink for every blue light.  Get with the program.)  And there will be endless Star Wars jokes, so the combination of the two should provide you with plenty of excuses to toss back a few.

Nudity: 0 Oh the ever important boobie.  Not a sight to be seen in this vast expanse of dredged time travel plot line.  For shame, Mark Hamill.  For shame.

OVERALL SCORE: 3 Hollywood, do you see what not having nudity in your movie will do to your BMDD score?!  For crying out loud, you had Rae Dawn Chong in your movie!  She'll take off her clothes if you promise her first dibs on the catering cart!  None-the-less, I loved this movie and highly recommend it as a BMDD depsite it's paltry average rating.  Viva La Hamill!

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The Telling

Here's the newest Bad Movie Drinky Drinky that we talked about in Episode # 55 of Talkingship.  Here is the IMDB synopsis:

In this horror anthology film, three girls pledge the most popular - and cruelest - sorority on campus. For their final task, they must tell the scariest story they know. Containing three distinct stories - one featuring a murderous doll, one a has-been actress and her run in with a film crew of the undead and, finally, a hunt-and-kill fright-fest. The tales inspire someone at the sorority to commit their own murders.

Let me start off by saying that this flick is NOT worth your time.  It scored pretty low on the Ship Scale, as you can see below.

Movie: The Telling

Special Rule: Ours was to pound a beer during a pillow fight.  The pillow fight never happened...

Drinkability: 1 (Nerves: 1 Jitterbug: 1)

Cheesability: 1.75 (Nerves: 1 Jitterbug 2.5)

Nudity: 2 (Nerves: 1 Jitterbug: 3)

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Garbage Day!

This clip comes from "Silent Night, Deadly Night 2."  We can go ahead and mark this one down as a MUST for a Christmas edition of Bad Movie Drinky Drinky!

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Troll 2 Clip

It's been too long since our last Bad Movie Drinky Drinky night!  I'm starting to get withdrawals.  A few minutes on trusty old Youtube looking up bad movie quotes should do the trick to ease my suffering. 

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Alien Intruder

Plot = Billy Dee Williams pilots a crew of convicts in search of a destroyed ship.  The criminals agree to go along for a chance at freedom as well as a chance to jerk off in a VR Simulator.  An alien intrudes on their voyage and slips into their VR Porn, making the men fall in love with her, and then kill each other.

Things to Watch For = Its Billy D, but its Billy in his waning years (I think all years post Jedi can be counted as 'waning' years for our Colt 45 sippin hero) and he's given up on that whole acting thing.  There's a cameo at the beginning from Charles In Charge alum, Jeff Conaway and even though it only lasts a few minutes, they are glorious.  If you buy this DVD, make sure to get the version that advertises "Over 45 Minutes of Previews" on the back.  The previews are as fun to make fun of as the movie, and half of them are soft-core porn flicks! And finally, our favorite goof in the flick is when an android takes a detour down a hallway for NO REASON WHAT-SO-EVER and walks over an electrical break in the flooring.  Classic.

Special Drinky Rule = A drink per Billy De-ified Line.
Drinkability = Nerves = 3 / Jitterbug = 3
Cheesability = Nerves = 3 / Jitterbug = 4
Nudity = Nerves = 2 / Jitterbug = 3
Overall Score = 3

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